Trader Tuesday - NEED YOUR INPUT! And, Some Bonus Whining

I'm having trouble focusing on my Trader Tuesday contribution. So, here's the plan. You are all going to help me out. Tell me what kind of recipe you are interested in today. Quick dinner ala Sandara Lee's Semi-homemade style? Or fancy-pants, send children away for the night, impress the hubs dinner ? Quick and easy dessert? Showy dessert? Old southern favs? One caveat - I DO NOT fry chicken at home. Ever. So, don't ask me about that. Ill post at 10:30, so get those requests in!

Reasons I cannot focus:

• Too long of a to-do list
• Fall Festival
• Obsessing about dress for wedding. If I get brave Ill take pics of myself in all three and you can vote. Or, not. My internet bravado has its limits.
• Damn family always needs to be fed
• Choosing furniture (read: OBSESSING!)
• Pissed off that the eldest got not one, BUT TWO, detentions! And would you effing believe that one of them was for SOCKS!!!!!
• Other general, pissiness of both the friend and marital nature.
• Went to Pilates for first time since December. Might I suggest that you do not ever take 10 months off of an activity you plan to continue? It hurts both your muscles and YOUR EGO very, very much.

Time to return to my normal life

Well, I survived. The festival is over and I'm still standing. Of course, the festival was on Saturday and Connor's biography book report, complete with paper bag puppet, was due Monday. So, we went from festival crazy into book report and puppet making....it never seems to end. I think that is because I jinxed myself earlier this year when I mentioned to someone that this year was much easier than I expected it to be. Jamie's 3-D book report project is due the next Monday. Then we are full into History Fair and Science Fair. For the love of Pete, WHY do we have to do the History and Science fairs????

At any rate, the Festival was a success. All the kids and families had a blast. We made money. There were only several minor crises to deal with.

And, since this blog is called A Yankee's Guide to Texas...let me just inform you about Texas men. (apologies to the few who are evolved enough to consider a person without an extra appendage intelligent) I have never encountered chauvinism anywhere I have lived like I did this past weekend at the festival. I actually had to pull my "navy wife" card out and say, "hey you bunch of num-nuts! I am more self sufficient than the lot of you are. Oh, and did I mention I have a brain? A rather smart one if I say so myself. And, if I ask you a freaking question, it is probably because I need and answer, not because I am trying to annoy you with idle chit-chat!" And, if I tell you that the generator you plan to connect to my 65 ft obstacle course will not supply sufficient power, maybe you should listen to me. Cuz you know what? When you ignore me and blow me off as some silly girl who knows nothing of amps and volts we all end up looking like idiots when the party rental company can't blow up the thing at 720am! Did you notice that I was right there next to you throwing hay bails and hammering nails? Seriously, I think some of these idiots still carry around smelling salts and hankies for dainty and fragile members of the fairer sex. Next year, I will know better how to deal with the Dad's mafia. Regular southern methods do not work here, I'll have to devise new methods to conquer the Texas men.

The kids had fun trick-or-treating. Grant was Thomas - again. Connor was a fighter pilot. Jamie was my candy passer outer. I am a wretched horrible mother and did not take a single picture. I'm tellin' ya, it is all I could do just to get homework done, dinner fed, and costumes on - no time for cameras. But, now, I must go to dig through all the candy to find any and all Milky Way Midnights !

Happy Halloween to you and yours. And, if you are not lame like me then I look forward to seeing pictures of all your ghosts and goblins.

Note To Self...

If you are going to have tickets printed for the school Fall Festival Raffle, you should check first to see that the item you are raffling off can actually be purchased. Otherwise, you might make an ass out of yourself crying in the 11th store you have been to in 3 hours that does not have that elusive item.

Then, you must buy a very large gift for a person (with a 4 day old baby) who starts stalking stores by phone and saves your sorry self from complete humiliation by directing you to a store to meet a delivery truck delivering three of the holy grail of electronic games!

Have I mentioned that I hate Festivals - well, at least ones I have to plan.

Anyone want a raffle ticket? Cuz you sure as hell won't easily be purchasing one of these babies on your own before Christmas unless you'd like to pay well over retail to one of the scavengers on e-bay.

AAARRRGH!

How do you know when you are over your head and drowning in Fall Festival planning?

When you order quiche, strawberries romanoff, and pinot gris for lunch while still in your workout clothes.

As I brought my tray back to our table, my friend, Heidi, took one look at the carafe and glass on the tray and said, "Dear God! What have they done to you?"

She is fully aware that I barely even drink alcohol at night with dinner anymore, much less at lunch. Not even a fancy-schmancy girls' lunch - just lunch after the gym! She followed up with, "Did Rich leave you or something? OMG, its that damn Fall Festival isn't it?"

I stared at her blankly and silently, and then poured a glass from the lovely carafe.

Festivals should be banned! Or, if someone is your freaking co-chair, then they should at least check their email or call you once in a while! OR just tell me I don't have a co-chair so that I can just accept the fact that I am on my own.

The best advice I have gotten so far is to make sure I do a really crappy job so that noone ever asks me to do it ever again.